Acknowledge the Inner Child

You know what’s interesting? The power of empathy. Like, true soul-led empathy.

I can look at the childhood photos of someone who’s caused me much trauma by the hand of their abuse and feel bad for them. I can see them from a perspective of curiosity, wondering what shifted in their own lives and upbringing that changed the trajectory of their life to afflicting that harm onto others?

I understand this may not be an easy or popular stance to hold, yet in a way it is healing for me. To look at adult versions and see the child in them. That maybe the way to stop a cycle is to not only forgive for yourself but also for the inner child of the perpetrator.

This is not to excuse bad behavior or invalidate our own experiences. It’s simply another way of looking at it and hopefully another way forward in the journey of healing from past traumas. To see people as the humans they are, knowing they have a backstory. And instead of just anger, which is valid, to also show compassion and to send up a prayer for healing to them so that the cycle can truly end with us.

Is this easier said than done? What emotions come up when you start to imagine someone who’s hurt you, as a child? Is it even possible to see them in such an innocent way? Can you hold space for both parts of their identity?